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EPISODE 29: A COOK WHO REFUSED TO BE LEFT BEHIND
Click on the image above for a direct link to a story regarding a case investigation by the Chief Rick Stone and Family Charitable Foundation courtesy of Fox News, Veterans Day, November 11, 2019
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Rick Stone was an integral part of helping to find the remains of my Great Uncle Merle Hillman. We are getting his remains home Wednesday and we get to bury him on the following Saturday. All I can say is Thank You and to all those families still waiting for that notification your Crew Mate has been identified just have patience. Great people like Chief Stone are doing their due diligence and they will be found trust me.
Dear Chief Stone,
You may not remember me, but I have never forgotten you. I am Suellen Fardelmann, survivor of Hollywood, Florida Police Officer Henry T. Minard, end of watch November 18, 1972. I recently found the copy of a letter I wrote to you after a very special, moving Memorial Service you organized. Lest you forget I would like to remind you of it as I to this day hold it in my heart with deep gratitude.
” May 16, 1997
Today marked a milestone in the healing process that happens slowly and at moments when least expected after tragedy. I have found it is, indeed, a process that is ongoing and sometimes goes unnoticed until you look back and remember that today is better than yesterday, or a month ago or ten years ago. And yet sometimes today is so much like yesterday that one cannot discern the difference. But today, this day, was different. And it was better. And it was because of you.
When Hank was shot November 18, 1972 at 5:02 p.m. and lost his fight for life at 8:03 p.m., my life was forever changed and I began my struggle to make him as proud of me as I was of him. I remember the faces of my little girls when I alone told them that Daddy’s body was like an egg in a shell. The shell was broken and we had to bury it, but the good part, the inside was with us because he left us his love and strength and spirit. I remember how long it took me to sleep in our bed, under the covers we shared, instead of the couch, or later, on top of the bedspread. I didn’t know how to balance the check book, cut the grass and never had been to the pediatrician alone. I was shy, introverted and alone. There were no counselors or chaplains then. To the department’s knowledge, at that time, Hank was the first officer killed in the line of duty. I was a disconcerting reminder of what could happen to every officer and every spouse. No one quite knew where I belonged or if I belonged.
Today I heard words for the first time since Hank’s death that surrounded me and held me and comforted me and made me belong. And those words were yours. They came from that place deep within one’s self where tears are held, where memories are preserved like roses pressed between the pages of a Bible and where pain is restrained in the pockets of our hearts. It is a place that holds such profound, inexpressible emotion that words are inadequate. But you spoke a language beyond words. You spoke feelings that reached the depths of my suffering and took it from me and divided it between us so that the burden was lighter, so much lighter and more bearable.
The thought and preparation you put into this memorial was moving and precious to me. I have repeated it to my family in words that do not do it justice. I wish I could replay the “video” in my mind and heart for them so that they might share my healing tears…your personally placing the wreath on the half mast flag pole, the helicopters, taps, bagpipes and most of all, the honor of a roll call. As the Officer spoke Hank’s name, I wanted to hug him and ask him to stay just for a moment to hold me back. But then, I know in my heart Hank was holding me as he and others, including your beloved friends, were saying thank you for remembering.
As I approach the time soon that one of the murderers comes up for parole, I will think of today and know that I am not alone, for although the only life sentence is mine, you will be with me in spirit as I fight for the justice of continued incarceration. You have made me feel I belong somewhere just like Hank belongs in my life as sure as the living who share my days. And he is held in that special place deep within.
They call us survivors and yet there are days when I wonder if I have survived or if, perhaps, I am just a lifeless shell. Then I look at my children and grandchild and husband who has always praised and loved Hank as a hero and supports my retreat into another life waiting with open arms when I return. And I know I am, indeed, still alive. Maybe that is why I have been left behind – to tell others that they too are still alive and that loving today is not exclusive or disrespectful of loving yesterday. And one’s heart can hold more than one love forever.
I thank you, Chief Stone, for the thoughts you have enabled me to think today because you were there to think them with me. My prayers are with you all who are the successors of my Hank and your Chip and all those heroes who have paid the price of our safety and our freedom. May God go with you every step of the way.
Kindest regards,
Suellen H. Fardelmann
Mayor of Cooper City
Survivor of Officer Henry T. Minard”
The depth and meaning of your caring efforts are still a treasure from which I gather strength, hope and peace. Our grandson is now a Police Officer. We have two grown granddaughters now and your memorial service is a beautiful, touching story I repeat to all of them, especially now as we approach the annual memorial service this coming Tuesday. Our newly promoted Chief Jeff Devlin says, with pride, that you hired him. He has lived up to your trust in him.
I am wishing you and your loved ones all the best life has to give. I hope to learn more about your admirable endeavors.
Suellen Fardelmann